The strangest moment of the NBA playoffs took place during Game 3 of the Lakers-Rockets series, when Kobe Bryant hit an 18-foot turnaround jumper from the left elbow with Shane Battier's right hand in his face. Bryant immediately began shaking his head with a look that indicated he smelled something really bad. This -- as you know -- is Kobe's dismissive face, the one he now makes after nearly every basket.
But that wasn't the strange part -- after all, how can something be strange when it happens anywhere from 10 to 25 times a game? The strange part came afterward, when he started back downcourt and turned to the TNT broadcasters at center court and yelled toward commentator Doug Collins.
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Ronald Martinez/Getty ImagesWe get it Kobe, no one can guard you. Now keep quiet and play the game.
"He can't guard me," Bryant said. Shaking his head, his mouth curled downward in a semicircle of disgust, he stared down Collins and said it again, "He can't guard me."
There was a pause on the broadcast. OK, that was meant for us, you could almost hear them thinking. So ... what do we say now? They couldn't ignore it, because it was clear to everyone watching that they were taken aback and that Kobe was the reason. Kevin Harlan acknowledged that Kobe was targeting Collins, one of the most even and knowledgeable minds in the game. When Harlan asked his partner what it was all about, Collins sounded genuinely perplexed. "I'm not sure," he said, and they quickly and quietly moved on.
And that's the deal about Kobe: None of us is sure. How can a guy with that much talent play with such little joy? Why does he feel he has to put on that phony tough-guy show all the time? Underneath all that pre-fab armor, who is he? Does he even know?
It's sad, maybe, but Kobe will never be appreciated in a manner commensurate with his ability. He's in the process of turning himself into an antihero. (In many respects, he is similar to Alex Rodriguez, another tin-eared superstar.) Everything he does reeks of insecurity, which is a really weird trait for a guy who -- along with LeBron James -- is a once-a-decade basketball talent.
Unlike LeBron, though, Kobe can't let his game speak for him. He has to accentuate everything with the facial expressions and the dismissiveness. It's not enough for him to beat someone; he feels compelled to belittle that person in the process. That's why one of the best things about the Lakers-Rockets series -- and, really, it's turning into a 700-page novel -- has been Shane Battier's reaction to Kobe's antics. And that reaction is this: zero. None. He acts as though he can't hear or see any of it.
Hey, Kobe, we know you're great. You know you're great. Shane Battier knows you're great. How about letting someone else say it first every once in a while? The way it works now, you're telling us so often that we're getting tired of it. Let us be the judge of whether someone can or cannot guard you. It's pretty self-explanatory, to Doug Collins and everybody else.
You see, I want to be able to enjoy Kobe's talent. I want to see it the way I see LeBron's: transcendent, mostly pure and emanating outward. It probably will never happen, though. Kobe won't let it.
For a guy with such a constant flow of creativity running through his game, it's amazing to see how calculated he is about his image. He comes across as though he's reading a script, and he's all wrong for the part (maybe Alan Alda reading a part meant for Harvey Keitel). There are just too many false notes, and the worst part is, he actually seems to believe this is what people want from him. This is the persona he has cultivated, and he's going with it no matter what. It's really kind of sad.
And this is where Kobe veers from the arrogant antihero routine perfected by someone such as Barry Bonds. Bonds didn't care what you thought about him. He thrived off the anger he generated. But this preening, jaw-jutting, head-shaking character is what Kobe believes people want.
Maybe it's his attempt to answer the questions of the Lakers' toughness. I don't know, but in the playoffs, his performances generally follow one of two themes: (1) He takes over the game and taunts everybody in sight, demanding that all acknowledge his greatness or (2) he steps back and intentionally doesn't take over a game, in which case his attitude seems to be, "See what they look like without me?" Either way, it's a tough act to embrace.
In the wake of Sunday's Game 4 disaster, when Battier and Ron Artest did guard Kobe -- and after which Magic Johnson said the Lakers defiled the team's honor -- it's a good bet Kobe will be at his contrived best in Tuesday night's Game 5. He'll probably dominate, and he'll undoubtedly let us know.
But here's a radical idea: Stop with the smugness and the arrogance. Play your game and let your talent speak for itself. You might not know this, but it does a much better job than you do. And if you're not going to enjoy what you bring to the court, at least give us half a chance.
ESPN The Magazine senior writer Tim Keown co-wrote Josh Hamilton's autobiography, "Beyond Belief: Finding the Strength to Come Back," which is available on Amazon.com. Sound off to Tim here.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Friggin' Divas...
Divas... Oh how I hate to harbor the disdain I have for you... but I harbor it anyways, and I can't help it.
Because... Lying to yourself about your self-worth is downright damnable. These divas and their shameless cognitive dissonance... at once, so self obsessed that they notice all of their flaws and have become conscious enough of them to get all wobbly-headed and finger-shaking whenever anyone such as seems to notice one of them, yet so over-the-top about how awesome they are that they, and the legions like them who have fallen in love with the makeup that these two syllables (Di-Va) provide, actually say stuff like, "I'm a Diva"... even when they can't sing. How many of you know what a diva really is. 'A diva is a celebrated female singer. The Italian term is used to describe a woman of rare, outstanding talent in the world of opera. ' Forget the real meaning, most of you chicks aren't even cool... and, your proclamation of divahood makes you much worse. The self obsession that points out your flaws and makes you self-conscious is the same general self-centered-ness that engenders these hollow diva claims. Choose one, self-conscious or conceited. All the nonsense has me dizzy as a Salvadore Dali painting. You're a diva huh? DESPITE YOURSELF...
But (and we all know that all great arguments are like good women in that they have massive, uningnorable but(t)s) perhaps this is not such a bad thing... at least not at first glance. It is when you give that diva a chance to tell you about themselves that the good evaporates.
In our transient world... where so many people we come in contact with, we never see again, makeup motivates people to improve themselves. The makeup that we all wear, man and woman alike, be it the stuff we put on our faces to hide blemishes, the clothes we wear that 'compliment' our figure, the way we have taught ourselves to walk or shake hands to exude confidence, or how we have altered our speaking voice to make ourselves more attractive/professional, serves as an advertisement for our understanding of perfection. When I see someone's bright red LV shoes that I like, I might go out and get some just like it. When I see someone's abs (I think this is when I'm supposed to say 'no homo'), I might hit the gym harder so I can get mine like that. Negative things can have the same effect. Seeing the fat dude coming out of mcdonald's could send me to the gym just as quick as an underarmour commercial (no homo again?). But... there is definitely a difference between the subtlety of wearing, speaking, or walking in a way that we think is attractive and the brash act of announcing one's diva (or "the man") status from the hilltops.
I suggest that we all be fly in silence... (ellipsis)
Because... Lying to yourself about your self-worth is downright damnable. These divas and their shameless cognitive dissonance... at once, so self obsessed that they notice all of their flaws and have become conscious enough of them to get all wobbly-headed and finger-shaking whenever anyone such as seems to notice one of them, yet so over-the-top about how awesome they are that they, and the legions like them who have fallen in love with the makeup that these two syllables (Di-Va) provide, actually say stuff like, "I'm a Diva"... even when they can't sing. How many of you know what a diva really is. 'A diva is a celebrated female singer. The Italian term is used to describe a woman of rare, outstanding talent in the world of opera. ' Forget the real meaning, most of you chicks aren't even cool... and, your proclamation of divahood makes you much worse. The self obsession that points out your flaws and makes you self-conscious is the same general self-centered-ness that engenders these hollow diva claims. Choose one, self-conscious or conceited. All the nonsense has me dizzy as a Salvadore Dali painting. You're a diva huh? DESPITE YOURSELF...
But (and we all know that all great arguments are like good women in that they have massive, uningnorable but(t)s) perhaps this is not such a bad thing... at least not at first glance. It is when you give that diva a chance to tell you about themselves that the good evaporates.
In our transient world... where so many people we come in contact with, we never see again, makeup motivates people to improve themselves. The makeup that we all wear, man and woman alike, be it the stuff we put on our faces to hide blemishes, the clothes we wear that 'compliment' our figure, the way we have taught ourselves to walk or shake hands to exude confidence, or how we have altered our speaking voice to make ourselves more attractive/professional, serves as an advertisement for our understanding of perfection. When I see someone's bright red LV shoes that I like, I might go out and get some just like it. When I see someone's abs (I think this is when I'm supposed to say 'no homo'), I might hit the gym harder so I can get mine like that. Negative things can have the same effect. Seeing the fat dude coming out of mcdonald's could send me to the gym just as quick as an underarmour commercial (no homo again?). But... there is definitely a difference between the subtlety of wearing, speaking, or walking in a way that we think is attractive and the brash act of announcing one's diva (or "the man") status from the hilltops.
I suggest that we all be fly in silence... (ellipsis)
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
The Origin of AIDS
Firstly, I'd like to recommend the website www.documentary-film.net. It's great; it has a ton of interesting documentaries on it.
If the origin of AIDS is of any interest to you, check out the following documentary: http://www.documentary-film.net/search/watch-now.php?&ref=5
... (ellipsis)
Monday, April 27, 2009
Taliban in Pakistan
The Taliban—from the Arabic word for student, “taleb”—are fundamentalist Sunni Muslims, mostly from Afghanistan’s Pashtun tribes. The Taliban dominates large swaths of Afghanistan and a large part of Pakistan’s Federally Administered Tribal Areas.
The Taliban seek to establish a puritanical caliphate that neither recognizes nor tolerates forms of Islam divergent from their own. They scorn democracy or any secular or pluralistic political process as an offense against Islam. The Taliban’s Islam, however, a close kin of Saudi Arabian Wahhabism, is far more perversion than interpretation. The Taliban’s version of Islamic law, or Sharia, is historically inaccurate, contradictory, self-serving and fundamentally deviant from prevailing interpretations of Islamic law and practice.
And they are encroaching on the capital of Pakistan, Islamabad.
... (Ellipsis)
The Taliban seek to establish a puritanical caliphate that neither recognizes nor tolerates forms of Islam divergent from their own. They scorn democracy or any secular or pluralistic political process as an offense against Islam. The Taliban’s Islam, however, a close kin of Saudi Arabian Wahhabism, is far more perversion than interpretation. The Taliban’s version of Islamic law, or Sharia, is historically inaccurate, contradictory, self-serving and fundamentally deviant from prevailing interpretations of Islamic law and practice.
And they are encroaching on the capital of Pakistan, Islamabad.
... (Ellipsis)
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Am I glad I left?
Not that I had any choice in the matter...
I recieved an email asking me if I am glad that I left Pakistan. The email contained this link:
http://www.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/asiapcf/04/22/pakistan.taliban/index.html
... (Ellipsis)
I recieved an email asking me if I am glad that I left Pakistan. The email contained this link:
http://www.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/asiapcf/04/22/pakistan.taliban/index.html
... (Ellipsis)
Monday, April 20, 2009
GOD IS NOT GREAT?
The title of this post is not a declaration of my religious apathy... it's an ode to blasphemy, a sin personified best by the great thinker Christopher Hutchens, author of a book sharing the title of this post.
If fornication is sex as sin, Blasphemy is breath... as sin... to be alive, one must blaspheme, or at least perform it's cousin vanity's bidding. Blasphemy is no more than the public, exhibitionist cousin to vanity. Once expressed outwardly, that tendency for some to understand themselves as being larger in relation to God than the Church intends, is blasphemy. Some say blasphemy is the use of the name of one or more gods, in a manner which is considered objectionable by a religious authority. This manner is typically any usage that belittles these grand gods in such a way that they lose relative greatness to Us (I blaspheme with my capitalization) as humans. It may include using sacred names as stress expletives without intention to pray or speak of sacred matters (Christ!, for instance). It is also sometimes defined as language expressing disapproved beliefs, or disbelief. (God is not great!, for instance) "Blasphemy" may be used by extension to describe any display of gross irreverence towards any person or thing deemed worthy of exalted esteem. (The King of England, despite his Divine Right, is not right at all. Didn't he screw the Boleyn girls?) Sometimes the word "blasphemy" is used loosely to mean any profane language, for example in "With much hammering and blasphemy, the locomotive's replacement spring was finally fitted."-- cause we all know how mechanics curse, don't we? With such a diverse group of definitions for this one term... and such grave consequences for its execution: Mat. 12:31 says, “Blasphemy against the Holy Ghost shall not be forgiven unto men..." it looks like we are all in trouble doesn't it? Cause blasphemy is just about any shocking public expression, from cursing to making any statement challenging those who are revered.
I honor blasphemy, as an idea, for the protection it provides Us from Us (I blaspheme again); from offending the great myths that we have made about our deaths, a stage that constitutes the vast and ever-growing majority of our futures... afterall, the Bible says that if we insult these myths in any way, they will magically cease to be our future realities... instead of myth, we will be given nightmare. I have also chosen to honor blasphemy in the same general, though more sound, way that some idiots in Springfield will one day honor a "great" coach like Larry Brown, who is capable of reining in a young and wild Allen Iverson... because the word blasphemy has come to symbolize our tendency, as humans, to be controlled by fear of the unknown yet inevitable... death. It is my belief that we cannot avoid blasphemy, at least not private blasphemy (although that adjective and noun might work together in oxymoronic opposition); we are all guilty, or blessed, with our questions...
And I do not honor blashphemy in any particularly blasphemous way... I do not honor it out of defiance to Him, nor out of hatred for life or Him. I honor blasphemy as that vain self-understanding, or search therefore, that makes real discussion, thought, and discovery possible. What shocks Us piques the attention of listeners and fosters educational environments.
Our ids require a me-centric approach to life which puts God second, places Him in our eternal vanity. He lives in our shadows... it is our fear of the darkness surrounding Him that incents us to exalt Him, praise Him, even capitalize HIM. Exalting Him, who we conveniently meet in our own personal armageddons (the only kind that me and Hutch believe in) brings light to the unknown darkness of death... and no more.
Just some dumbass thoughts... (Ellipsis)
If fornication is sex as sin, Blasphemy is breath... as sin... to be alive, one must blaspheme, or at least perform it's cousin vanity's bidding. Blasphemy is no more than the public, exhibitionist cousin to vanity. Once expressed outwardly, that tendency for some to understand themselves as being larger in relation to God than the Church intends, is blasphemy. Some say blasphemy is the use of the name of one or more gods, in a manner which is considered objectionable by a religious authority. This manner is typically any usage that belittles these grand gods in such a way that they lose relative greatness to Us (I blaspheme with my capitalization) as humans. It may include using sacred names as stress expletives without intention to pray or speak of sacred matters (Christ!, for instance). It is also sometimes defined as language expressing disapproved beliefs, or disbelief. (God is not great!, for instance) "Blasphemy" may be used by extension to describe any display of gross irreverence towards any person or thing deemed worthy of exalted esteem. (The King of England, despite his Divine Right, is not right at all. Didn't he screw the Boleyn girls?) Sometimes the word "blasphemy" is used loosely to mean any profane language, for example in "With much hammering and blasphemy, the locomotive's replacement spring was finally fitted."-- cause we all know how mechanics curse, don't we? With such a diverse group of definitions for this one term... and such grave consequences for its execution: Mat. 12:31 says, “Blasphemy against the Holy Ghost shall not be forgiven unto men..." it looks like we are all in trouble doesn't it? Cause blasphemy is just about any shocking public expression, from cursing to making any statement challenging those who are revered.
I honor blasphemy, as an idea, for the protection it provides Us from Us (I blaspheme again); from offending the great myths that we have made about our deaths, a stage that constitutes the vast and ever-growing majority of our futures... afterall, the Bible says that if we insult these myths in any way, they will magically cease to be our future realities... instead of myth, we will be given nightmare. I have also chosen to honor blasphemy in the same general, though more sound, way that some idiots in Springfield will one day honor a "great" coach like Larry Brown, who is capable of reining in a young and wild Allen Iverson... because the word blasphemy has come to symbolize our tendency, as humans, to be controlled by fear of the unknown yet inevitable... death. It is my belief that we cannot avoid blasphemy, at least not private blasphemy (although that adjective and noun might work together in oxymoronic opposition); we are all guilty, or blessed, with our questions...
And I do not honor blashphemy in any particularly blasphemous way... I do not honor it out of defiance to Him, nor out of hatred for life or Him. I honor blasphemy as that vain self-understanding, or search therefore, that makes real discussion, thought, and discovery possible. What shocks Us piques the attention of listeners and fosters educational environments.
Our ids require a me-centric approach to life which puts God second, places Him in our eternal vanity. He lives in our shadows... it is our fear of the darkness surrounding Him that incents us to exalt Him, praise Him, even capitalize HIM. Exalting Him, who we conveniently meet in our own personal armageddons (the only kind that me and Hutch believe in) brings light to the unknown darkness of death... and no more.
Just some dumbass thoughts... (Ellipsis)
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